Play therapy

An adult enters therapy and talks. A six-year-old can't do that — not because they don't want to, but because the ability to name an internal state and place it in context develops late. Asked "how do you feel?", they'll answer "fine", because that's the answer they've learned.

Play is the language they already have. A child who arranges figures in a doll's house and puts the father in a different room is saying something very precise. A child who endlessly repeats a car crash with toy cars is processing an event, not playing at random.

Play therapy isn't "supervised playtime". It's a structured method in which the therapist tracks recurring themes, watches what changes over time, and intervenes inside the play — not outside it, with explanations the child can't use.

There are two families of approach, and good therapists combine them.

Non-directive — the child chooses what to do, and the therapist accompanies them, reflecting what they observe ("the little boy hides every time the big car comes"). The premise is the same as in person-centred therapy: in an accepting space, the child brings what they need to process.

Directive — the therapist proposes targeted activities: therapeutic stories, themed drawing, role play for a specific situation. Useful when there's an identifiable event — a divorce, a hospitalisation, a death.

Work with the parents is the component people underestimate and which often produces most of the change. The therapist will teach you how to respond to a meltdown, how to set a limit without escalating, what to say when your child asks why their father is leaving. With young children, this part matters more than what happens in the playroom.

Sessions are shorter than with adults — 30-45 minutes, matched to the child's attention. The first one or two are usually with the parents alone, so they can speak freely about history without the child hearing.

Very young children may have a parent in the room at first, then come in alone once they feel safe. The room deliberately holds materials that allow expression: figures, sand, modelling clay, pencils, a doll's house.

You'll get periodic feedback meetings — every four to six sessions — about the direction of the work and what you can do at home. You won't get the content of sessions, and that's a protection: a child who learns that everything they do is reported home shuts down, exactly like a teenager.